........I feel so betrayed

I found something yesterday and there's no point in bringing it up now......but it hurt me deeply. I felt sick to my stomach for a while. Then I felt confused. Then I felt all alone in this world. I don't think I've ever felt that alone before. It was a horrible, empty feeling. Then I just felt hurt again. I drove around for a while just feeling 


S T U P I D 


Then I felt hurt and alone. I didn't want to feel alone anymore so I did something quite foolish. I thought I'd feel better but I just felt worse, guilty even, for being so foolish. I spent a few hours questioning myself.


"HOW COULD YOU BE SO STUPID?!?!" 


I never got a clear answer...


I decided to at least come clean about the foolishness but that led to confusion. I finally couldn't take the migraine pain of all that thinking anymore so I downed a few sleeping pills and cried myself to sleep! 


Today I wake up feeling betrayed, hurt, angry, really, really, stupid, fearful,and confused...


When I said "I do" it meant that I would always...Apparently...it never meant that to him.....I've been played.....